Guinea Pig Connection

Older Pig, Younger Pig: When A Good Pair Falls Apart

Oh boy, how many of us have been in Diana's shoes?

"I have two male guinea pigs...father and son and they have lived together since the son was born. Kiko (the father) is around 2 years old while Ringo (the son) isn't one yet. They have lived together with no problems. Lately they have become very strange, chattering their teeth at one another. Ringo chases Kiko around the cage and throws himself at Kiko. Kiko...has become very scared and hides wherever he can. He has been tired and sleepy most of the time, while before he was very active and generally good humoured. I'm not sure whats going on. I've separated them because I'm scared that when I'm not there something bad will happen and I can't help them."

Diana did the right thing by separating her boys. Ringo is relentless and Kiko is miserable and showing signs of depression (i.e., hiding, lethargy). But what happened?

One word: Hormones

After months of being a dutiful young son learning from his dad how to be a big boy, Ringo is individuating from his father. His hormones are surging and he's thinking he'd like to be alpha male now -- and he's basically wrestling with his father to claim that title. Although the seemingly gentle-natured Kiko apparently isn't putting up a fight,  Ringo seems determined to keep hammering on this point. He's behaving like a bully now, and Kiko is clearly feeling victimized.

You can keep them separated for a short time and try reintroducing them a little later. Maybe they'll restore harmony, maybe you'll see the pattern repeat. (I suspect the latter will prove true. If you do end up having to permanently separate them, keeping them in side-by-side cages or side-by-side partitioned areas in a very large C&C cage should give both pigs enough company and socialization to keep them from getting lonely or depressed.

Related Topics

• Should These Guinea Pigs Remain Together?
• Will My Male Guinea Pigs Ever Bond?

A Trophy Won't Win You Points With A Guinea Pig

Roxy Sorkin must have one particularly brassy guinea pig.

In his acceptance speech at last night's Academy Awards ceremony, Aaron Sorkin (who won the Best Adapted Screenplay Oscar^TM for "The Social Network") called out the little devil on the international broadcast. He finished his pithy, eloquent, and refreshingly humble speech with the comment: "Roxy Sorkin, your father just won the Academy Award. I’m going to have to insist on some respect from your guinea pig." The comment -- an admission of being stymied (if not bested) by a 2-1/2 pound furball -- only added to Sorkin's likability as he walked off stage.

Anyone who has lived with guinea pigs for any length of time can chuckle at the comment and make a few guesses about what Roxy's guinea pig must be doing to "disrespect" her father. Run away when he comes to the cage. Chews on his fingers. Chews on his shirt. Fidgets incessantly while he tries to sit with it. Poops on him. Pees on him. Sasses at him for a snack. A myriad of possible behaviors.

The misconception about guinea pigs is that they're simple creatures, that all you have to do is feed them and you're in like Flynn. But guinea pigs are not won over by superficial gestures. They cannot be schmoozed. Because they are prey animals, which makes them anxious and fearful by default, they're slow to trust. It takes time, calm effort, and gentleness to form a bond with them. It's a process that cannot be rushed.

Guinea pigs are actually a lot like horses in this regard. In her book "Inner Peace for Busy People," Joan Borysenko relates a story about an equine experience program she participated in. During the program, she learned that "...horses were like mirrors that showed you who you really were....[they] respond to our energy, mirroring our emotions and intentions." They pick up on frustration, impatience, anxiety, irritation, aloofness -- emotional turmoil of any kind -- and respond accordingly. "Horses are very sensitive to energy," Borysenko writes. "They respond to peaceful clarity of intention."

If you're trying to connect with a guinea pig, and it's not progressing to your expected timetable, frustration inevitably rises. Frustration begets more frustration. And, if you don't do a course correction and try something new, frustration begets irritation -- and the guinea pig will respond to neither favorably. It matters not to a guinea pig that you're formidable in the board room, hypnotically persuasive in a sales presentation, or capable of successfully pitching a screenplay in a town drowning in screenplay pitches. Success with human beings does not necessarily beget success with guinea pigs (though I contend that the reverse is true).

The beauty of guinea pigs (all animals, really) is that quality time with them forces you to get out of your head, snap out of your mood, slow down, and be fully present with them. And when you think about it, these are all things you need to do in any relationship in order for it to be successful. For Sorkin, who makes his living in a fast-paced and uber-connected industry, his daughter's guinea pig may well be The Universe's way of planting a reminder in his life to stay grounded and stay present in spite of the insanity and busy-ness swirling around him.

It's been said that daughters keep their fathers humble (maybe even moreso than their wives). Sorkin's comment at last night's ceremony suggests that there's a guinea pig in his life doing the same thing. And that, I think, is a good thing. 

My Guinea Pig Is Chewing Her Roommate's Hair!

Of all the things a guinea pig could want to chew on, a cagemate's hair should be the last thing on the list, right? But, in one of the weirder twists of guinea pig behavior, it does happen. Delly and Sage, in the rescue's sanctuary, had to be separated because of persistent hair chewing. And, it seems, Roxy and Twilight are also having issues.

Their mom writes: "We purchased two young female guinea pigs in September. One is long haired, the other short. The short haired one is constantly "biting" at the long haired one, pulling out tufts of hair and eating it. Obviously, the long haired piggie isn't fond of this, and does screech, but it does not stop the short haired piggy from doing it. Is this a dominance thing? Should I separate them? When they are separated, they both whistle their discontent for being on their own..."

Such behavior typically is either boredom issues or dominance issues, though other causes -- like lack of other things to chew on, or obsessive-compulsive neuroticism -- can't be ruled out either.

Whatever the cause, this a behavior that should not be allowed to continue for two reasons. First, there's the emotional health of the pig being pestered, and the physical pain of having hair pulled out. Second, there's the physical health of the pig doing the chewing and pulling, because all that hair going into their gastro-intestinal tract is not a good thing.

Dominance Issues

If one pig's squeaks of pain aren't stopping the other one from chewing and pulling, you're likely looking at a dominance issue. One pig is determined to be alpha pig in the cage, and reminds the roommate so often that the behavior meets all the criteria for harassment and bullying. A guinea pig that isn't meek by nature, or hasn't been "beaten down" by a roommate, has no trouble whipping around on a pest and nipping at them, chattering their teeth in warning, or huffing and stomping. A guinea pig that isn't sticking up for itself needs its humans to intercede.

At minimum, the pigs need to be separated into adjoining cage spaces (such as fastening a couple of grids in the middle of a C&C cage to create partitioned spaces) or into side-by-side cages. This way, they can still visit with each other, but the victim has a break from the harassment and the bully has time to settle down. The hope is that the temporary loss of a roommate will effect a behavior change in the bully (i.e., "Every time I chew on my roommate's hair, I get stuck living by myself...which I hate").

In some cases, the temporary separation won't change behavior and the guinea pigs have to be permanently separated. If this is the case, keeping the pigs in side-by-side cages or adjoining partitions in a large C&C cage will ward off loneliness.

Boredom

Guinea pigs need things in their cages to keep them entertained, and if they're feeling under-stimulated they'll either sleep all the time or pester each other. They, like rabbits, also need stuff to chew on to keep their teeth from overgrowing. A sufficiently entertained pig is too busy to harass roommates.

Having tunnels to run through can promote chase games (the fun kind) and hide-and-seek, and tunnels like Chubes do double-duty by providing something to run through and gradually tear apart. Having a couple of hay baskets with different kinds of hay provides dietary variety. And a simple paper bag or wrapping paper tube, stuffed with hay or not, can keep guinea pigs entertained for hours. My first trio of pigs spent a year chewing on their wooden hide-a-way house, enlarging the width of the door and the front window.

Basic Neuroticism

There are some cases that I'm inclined to believe are nervous habits (like nail biting) that spin out into irrational, uncontrollable neurotic behavior. If the hair chewer is overly anxious and skittish in general, the hair chewing may be a symptom of anxiety. Whether the anxiety is an inherent condition the pig was born with, or was caused by something in a previous home, or is triggered by something in the current household environment (e.g., frequent loud noises, persistent uproar from children at play, etc.) is something that is going to require observation and deduction on the part of the owners.

To be clear, I'm drawing a line of distinction between hair chewing and hair chewing accompanied by pulling. When the line has been crossed into hair pulling, and one pig is squeaking out in pain, then you have an unmistakeable dominance issue playing out. When it's hair chewing, any one of the causes I've written about here could be the root of the behavior, and owners will need to observe and deduce through some process of elimination.

In the case of neurotic behavior, you can try the same strategy of temporary separation as a way of breaking an unhealthy pattern.

Whatever The Cause, The Behavior Is Unhealthy For Both Pigs

Ultimately, your goal is to break the bad behavior and distract the hair chewer's attention with more productive means of entertainment. It's similar to recovering nail biters taking up hobbies like needlework or knitting to keep their hands busy until they get over the urge to bite their fingernails.

In the event, though, that you have a severe case that won't be resolved, don't be afraid to separate the guinea pigs. The greater misery for them would be to remain in this kind of twisted, unhappy existence for the rest of their lives.

Should These Guinea Pigs Remain Together?

On our Myth #2: Pairs Must Be From The Same Litter post, Brittney asked:

I recently bought two piggies from the same pet store. They were together at the store, and seemed fine. However, when we brought them home, they started chattering and chasing. They haven't chased in a few days, and I still experience mild chatter every now and then, though it doesn't seem hostile any more. The pet store...had them in the same cage, then after buying them gave me the parting words of "They're going to kill each other" Poor Dexter won't leave his hut if Murdoc is out and if he is trying to eat and Murdoc even sticks his head out, Dexter runs back into the hut. Is he afraid of him? It has only been a few days. No blood was ever drawn and they don't fight, and when there is chasing being done, it is usually Murdoc chasing Dexter. Will they never get along?...

Without being able to watch the guinea pigs in action myself, I'm missing out on some behavioral nuances, especially with the alpha-male-apparent Murdoc. But based on what Brittney described, this is what I think...

Murdoc is obnoxious bordering on bullying, yes. Aggressive, I don't think so (at least not yet). Dexter is shy, reserved, easily intimidated, sensitive to harassment.

It's likely there is a sorting-out of power in the cage. Or else you have one pig who is not necessarily interested in being an alpha male and the other one, instead of simply accepting that as fact, feels the need to assert himself further just to make it clear he's laying claim to alpha male status...just in case his roommate thinks he can change his mind later.

It's not uncommon to see this behavior when pigs have been pulled from a larger colony. It's possible that in the pet store cage, there was an alpha male. Free from that hierarchy, Murdoc is seizing the opportunity to be alpha male in their new digs. Sometimes, the behavior occurs when there's a change in living environment -- new cage, larger cage, new home. It's as if someone is saying, "Our digs may have changed, but the pecking order hasn't." (For other causes, read our post titled "Will My Male Guinea Pigs Ever Bond?")

I would keep an eye on them and make sure the behavior doesn't escalate in frequency, nature, etc. You don't want to keep them together if the less-dominant one (Dexter) is really getting bullied. For now, I would get a hidey house that has two entrances, such as the Tropical Fiddlesticks houses. That way if your alpha male becomes a real nuisance in a hidey house, your shy one has more than one exit. Even better, have two houses so both pigs have a place to which they can retreat.

Your real gauge is the behavior of the less-dominant guinea pig. If he is increasingly reclusive (and, especially, if he is rapidly so) and all but refuses to be out of the safety of the hidey house while the alpha male is out and about, you have a beaten-down and depressed guinea pig and it would be neglectful to continue to house the two pigs together. Depressed guinea pigs don't eat and drink enough or at all. Pigs that don't eat and drink enough get sick. Sick, depressed pigs don't have the will to fight through illness. The picture gets uglier from here.

I wouldn't let the reclusiveness drag out for more than three weeks beyond what you've already witnessed. If it turns out they can't remain roommates, you can make them neighbors. Just upgrade their cage to a 2x4 C&C cage and drop and tie two grids in the middle, creating a 2x2 section for each pig. That way, they'll still be able to see and socialize with each other, no one will get lonely, and...more importantly...no one will get bullied.

Will My Male Guinea Pigs Ever Bond?

Over on our uber-popular Myth #1: Male Guinea Pigs Can't Live Together post, Andrea asked:

I have a 2 year old male guinea pig named Murray, he's very calm with humans (he doesn't bite, he's calm and is trained). I've just got another guinea pig we named him Pablo, he is another male guinea pig, he likes to snuggle with Murray. They seem not to be getting along at all... Murray is a short haired guinea pig, and Pablo is a fluffy haired guinea pig.. I was wondering if they will eventually get along or is it something to do with their race of boar/their personalities?

The answer is that it has everything to do with their personalities, and nothing to do with their breed. They might get along better with time, they might have an irreparable falling out in the future, or they might simply tolerate each other in a civil--but not contented--cohabitation.

Guinea pigs are generally amiable spirits, and the vast majority stay true to the communal nature of their species (they want roommates, not solitary living). But that doesn't mean every guinea pig gets along with every other guinea pig. Sometimes, for reasons we humans may never know, someone just...plain...doesn't...like...someone else. It might be instant dislike, or it might be something that develops over time. On a number of occasions, when Cindy introduces two males, there's tension but not instant fighting--until many minutes (or hours or, occasionally, a few days) later tensions boil over because one pig has realized the other pig is...not...going...away, and wants to make sure he does.

If your guinea pigs seem to be getting off to a less-than-smooth start, there are a few reasons to consider:

• the longer resident pig might be having adjustment/adaptive issues with sharing space he's been used to having to himself, even if the introduction process was gradual and relatively non-contentious
  
• the longer resident pig might be peeved because he feels like the introduction of a new roommate was too abrupt
  
• the newer pig is not respecting boundaries because he's trying to assert his dominance
• the newer pig is not respecting boundaries because he's trying too hard to fit in (e.g., trying to snuggle too soon)
  
• someone just doesn't like someone else
  

Unfortunately, you don't know what's going to happen until you try to pair up two guinea pigs. This is where guinea pig rescues can be a huge help--they typically have a number of adoptables, they know the personalities of the individual pigs in their care, and they can usually make a couple of well-informed guesses about who might be a good match for your pig.

If your males do have a falling out, you'll need to put them in separate cages. You might find they do better as neighbors and derive sufficient companionship from the arrangement that loneliness and depression won't be an issue for either of them.

More Things Your Guinea Pig Should Not Eat

Last fall, I wrote about the 10 things that your guinea pig should not eat, which also included links to other lists of poisonous and toxic plants.

Ellen Falbowski (the rescue's board secretary and the person prepping Joanne's piggy photos for the latest batch of photo notecards in our Zazzle gallery) has brainstormed another list of common household items that guinea pigs occasionally come in contact with -- but really never should. Or, as Ellen semi-humorously puts it, "items that could be hanging next to the cage, overlooked by the owners but not by the pigs!"

The list includes:

• electric wire, telephone wire, speaker wire, computer cable
• curtains
• venetian blinds
• venetian blind cords
• plastic bags of any kind, which can result in intestinal blockage if ingested (e.g., grocery bags, garbage bags, paper towel wrappers, bags that contain(ed) guinea pig food pellets or hay)
• deli-style plastic containers and lids (too soft, will be nibbled)
• houseplants, especially hanging plants (e.g., spider plant, philodendron, etc.)

Even if you think your guinea pigs would never fool with these things (because they haven't...yet) don't be so sure. One, guinea pigs have a habit of biting into unfamiliar things in order to determine what they are (or, rather, to determine whether the mystery things are food), and can nibble at them obsessively if you don't interfere and take the thing away. Two, owners should never underestimate the persistence and ingenuity of bored guinea pigs.

So take a few seconds to look around your pigs' cage and play area and see what's there. You just might find a hay bag or houseplant silently waiting to cause trouble!

Can A Guinea Pig Be Too Old For A First Roommate?

On the ever-popular Myth #1: Male Guinea Pigs Can't Live Together post, Frances asked:

i have a male guinea that is about 4 years old. i want to get him a friend but i'm afraid he might be too old. i have introduced him once to another male and he was very "dominant" with him, if you know what i mean. anyhow, do you have any suggestions. i have thought about taking him to a pet store to see if they would let me socialize him with another male to see if they would get along. would that be a good or bad thing?

The answer? It depends on the pig.

Guinea pigs are, by nature, social animals for whom communal living with members of their own species is not only instinctual, it's critical to their physical and emotional well-being. So, no, attempting to find this boar a roommate is not a bad thing.

But, as I've written before, everything about guinea pigs comes down to individual personality -- so categorical statements about what will or won't work are virtually impossible. Observation by owners, breeders, and rescues over the last decades (including the writings of Peter Gurney) gives enough anecdotal information to help owners make well-informed gambles, but there are no guarantees.

Age won't be a deterrent to introducing a first roommate to an older guinea pig of either sex -- so long as the older guinea pig is open to having a roommate. Age might be a challenging variable, but I won't say it's an absolute. An older guinea pig might decide it doesn't want a roommate (ever), or it might surprise itself by liking the idea of a live-in buddy...especially when the perfect one arrives. Even a guinea pig that isn't displaying overt signs of depression still could be experiencing loneliness at some level and, thus, would be receptive to company.  

I will say that going to a rescue might yield a better chance at matching success than going elsewhere, because the rescue workers know the temperaments of their guinea pigs and can identify the ones who are likely to mesh the best with your pig's temperament. Once you've found some candidates, it comes down to handling the introductions properly, and listening to what your guinea pig tells you through body language and other behaviors (e.g., eating peacefully together, curling up in a corner together, teeth chattering, huffing, stomping, excessive domination, nipping, charging, etc.).

As a final note, you're not likely to find a pet store that will let you bring your pig onto the premises and try introducing him/her to different candidates. Generally, it's come in, pick out a critter, take it home, and live with the decision (whether your pig accepts the roommate or not). Also, it's really not recommended since the health of the pet store pigs can be a bit of a question mark. The young guinea pigs brought into the stores from the breeders often experience an enormous amount of stress that can affect their immune systems and make them susceptible to things like upper respiratory infections, which are contagious. (Think about it: at eight weeks old, these pigs lose contact with their mothers, sometimes their siblings, and their first home, and are taken to a new, brightly lit, noisy living environment with new roommates that disappear each day and don't come back. Wouldn't that stress you out?)

We're not disqualifying pet store pigs, and we know that some people don't have guinea pig rescues in their area or other avenues for the adoption option. But if you do get a pet store pig, you should plan on keeping side-by-side cages for 21 days to allow for a quarantine period, giving the pigs time to get to know each other, and being prepared for the possibility that they won't get along. The pet store won't take the critter back, so you'll either have pigs in side-by-side cages permanently or will need to rehome the new pig with a good family.

Finding your guinea pig a roommate can prove to be far easier than you anticipated, or every bit as challenging as you feared. But if you succeed, even if it was a difficult and drawn-out process, you'll be well-rewarded by the sight of your piggy blissfully napping with its new buddy.

Chuckles From A Poetry Book

My friend Diana sent me a book she'd found at a book sale at her son's school, titled "Oh, Theodore!" by Susan Katz. This illustrated collection of verse promises that readers will "discover the work involved in caring for a pet...But it hardly seems like work once your pet becomes your best friend." The book was published in 2007 but this is the first I've heard of it. The illustrator perfectly captured some classic guinea-pig mannerisms. The author based Theodore on her son's guinea pig, who "liked to join in family conversations, especially if they contained the word lettuce." (Yep, she's got the species pegged. Definitely enslaved by a guinea pig.)

As I leafed through the pages filled with cute illustrations of the brown-haired guinea pig named Theodore, I had to chuckle over some of the entries. How many of us can relate to this verse:

THEO-DOOR

Open

the kitchen door.

Theodore sits.

Open

the cupboard door.

Theodore sits.

But open

the refrigerator door.

Here comes Theodore!

Later in the book came a verse that will resonate, in particular, with folks who have older guinea pigs:

SPRING STROLL

Out to the yard

we go.

But I don't

take Theodore

for a walk.

I take him

for a sit.

The verse is accompanied by an illustration of Theodore and his young owner sitting outside on the grass, facing each other as if to say, "Okay, now what?" It's followed by another funny (and familiar) verse, titled "Lucky":

I'm the one

who found 

a four-leaf clover.

But Theodore's

the one

who ate it.

The book is suitable for beginning readers, and can be found online through e-tailers like Amazon and through your local bookstore. As with most books, we found a couple of things portrayed in the illustrations that we don't agree with -- but we'll get into that in another post at another time. For now, we'll look at it for what it is: a good concept with cute illustrations that will (hopefully) encourage beginning readers to read it on their own, and younger kids to ask Mom and Dad to read it to them (again and again).

When Do You Introduce A New Roommate?

When a guinea pig dies, when do you bring home a new roommate for the one left behind to grieve? In the last three weeks or so, we've had e-mails from owners who were facing the inevitability of having to put gravely ill guinea pigs to sleep.

My short answer is "Your pig will tell you."

Until you've had a guinea pig or two (or more) you don't realize how deeply these critters can grieve, or how quickly they can sink into a depression and how long they can stay in that psychological state until you pull them out of it. There's a fine line between letting a guinea pig mourn the loss of a friend and adjust to life without him/her and letting the guinea pig slide into a full-blown depression. Depression isn't to be trifled with, to be treated with a wait-and-see approach for too long. Loss of appetite, decreased water drinking, lethargy, zero interest in things that used to draw a reaction, little to no socializing with human companions -- all are signs of depression, and all can lead to more serious illness if they're not stopped.

Cari's Story

Cari wrote to us about her pair of female guinea pigs, one of whom is very sick and does not have a lot of time left in her life. She wrote to us, "I am worried about her companion. I fear she will be so lonely, and I know they do better in pairs and I want to get another female for her....I also wonder when another should be introduced, before or after?" I give her a lot of credit for thinking ahead like this, and for proceeding with caution instead of acting too soon. For a lot of folks, balancing compassion and restraint is not easy.

My advice to Cari is that she wait until after her guinea pig dies. The sick one is dealing with enough stress from her illness, and the healthy one is dealing with the stress of seeing her friend fade away. (Yes, I am fully convinced that these animals know before us humans when they are preparing to cross over.) Introducing another pig at this time is more stress -- and avoidable stress at that. Let the girls close out their lives together, and when the sick one crosses over, Cari and her remaining guinea pig need to grieve together and comfort each other.

Observation will tell Cari when her guinea pig is getting depressed -- she may see it within a few days, or it might be longer. But it will come, and it's best to act when the symptoms first start to appear. It's rare for a guinea pig who's used to having a roommate to function well as a lone pig for any length of time. They get used to constant companionship -- and not having it for an extended period of time turns their world upside down with unhealthy consequences.

Stacey's Story

Stacey started talking to us when she was trying to make the difficult decision between euthanizing her middle-aged guinea pig or putting her through inordinately expensive and risky surgery that offered disproportionately little in the way of guarantees of post-operative longevity. The prospect of needing to get a new roommate (someday) for her remaining guinea pig was never brought up. Honestly, as rattled by the experience as Stacey understandably was, adoption of another pig was not something I expected her to consider for a while.

After putting Cupcake to sleep, Stacey -- grieving and worried about her remaining guinea pig -- bought two 5-month-old females on the same day as Cupcake's death. Warned by the pet store clerk that her guinea pig might fight with the new ones in order to establish herself as "alpha female," Stacey did some online research to find out how to introduce them all. Introductions on neutral ground went well -- sharing space in the cage did not. After breaking up the fighting, Stacey did more online research. Her next steps were a) cleaning everything in the cage with vinegar, and b) giving everyone a bath together. After another rough beginning, the younger girls got the hint that there was only one queen bee -- and it wasn't either of them. When last I heard from Stacey, there seemed to be some kind of continuing peace in the cage.

In her last e-mail, Stacey wrote, "I thought it would be easy to bring new pigs home." I thought to myself, "You don't know what a lucky break you had. The fight could have been worse, blood could have been drawn by a bad bite, those three pigs might never have called a truce -- and then you really would have been stuck."

I can't say I blame Stacey's pig for her initial reaction. She was not happy about losing her friend and acquiring two strange roommates in her cage on the same day. It's a lot of adjustment to ask her to make. (Stacey was acting from a broken heart and concern for her guinea pig, so you can understand her impulse.) I'm just relieved it seems to have worked out as quickly as it did.

Again, how long you wait before bringing someone new home really does depend on the individual pig, but I firmly believe that the grieving process needs to be given space and time. We humans would demand and expect that for ourselves, and, knowing what emotions animals are capable of, I think they expect it as well.

When Lap Time With Piggy Gets All Wet

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote a post about reasons why a guinea pig might bite or nibble your hand. The post stemmed from a question e-mailed to me by a young girl. A follow-up question from her yielded another dilemma. She wrote, "She has started peeing on me all the time, it's really very annoying. I don't know what to do. I know that they have signals, but she's always biting me or nibbling so I don't know."

Most of the time, guinea pigs are actually quite polite, giving us signals when they need a bathroom break. These signals can include:

• constant fidgeting accompanied by repeated checking of their back ends
• circling around and around on your chest or lap
• constantly repositioning themselves, dropping their rumps on you with an adamant thump
• backing their rumps up to the edge of your lap, shoulder, chest, arms, etc. (in an attempt to pee away from you and them)
• biting or nibbling your hand or fingers (usually when you've missed, or ignored, all other signals)

While wet laps don't occur every time you hold your guinea pigs, they do happen. You can minimize your chances with simple observation and careful timing. Notice when guinea pigs drink a fair amount of water (though guinea pigs who habitually drink a lot of water can be a particular challenge), and give their bodies time to process it before holding them -- or plan on a short session of cuddling. Same goes for pigs who have just eaten juicy fruits or vegetables, like melon, cucumber, and so forth.

Learn, too, each pig's unique clock. I've had pigs who could sit on my lap for an hour or more before the urge hit, and others that get the urge after 20 minutes or so. I've also encountered pigs who had a habit of peeing when they were half-asleep, presumably because they got so relaxed that their bladders let loose but their internal alarms didn't go off. Age can also be a factor; very young guinea pigs haven't learned to "be polite" yet, and the bladders of older guinea pigs are not as resilient as they once were.

In rare cases, with guinea pigs that don't (by nature) like to be held much, the "I gotta pee" alarm seemed like a measure of self-defense, of protecting their boundaries. They didn't want to be held, tolerated it for a handful of minutes, and then triggered the panic button...presumably because they'd learned through experience that the threat of getting peed on was the one thing that would get their human to put them back in their cage or play area.

All that said, no matter how watchful you are, the odds are that you'll get peed on at least once, and probably more. Rather than get soaked, learn to have some cozy sacks or old clean towels handy for lap time. As a general practice, I always have a towel folded up under my pigs. If you want a little extra protection, puppy pee pads are a great investment.

If you've noticed that your pigs have some signals that I didn't list here, please share them. Every pig is different and, thus, so are the warning signals.